Motivation

        Just over a month ago,  I started doing daily vlogs again. I have attempted to do daily vlogs on several occasions but the longest I've gone was three months straight. I have found it difficult in the past because after a few days, everything seems to become repetitive, and sometimes it really is but that's the beauty of daily vlogs is that you can see the up and downs and the slow days of a person's life. August was VEDA, Vlog every day in August. Which was just straight up vlogs, and I had started making some changes and doing some stuff. September, Shay carl started doing "staytember," where he is basically challenging his viewers to make some sort of change in their life and set 3 goals from the month of semptember. Granted I have a few goals but they are all manageable and following shay's challenge has given me motivation to do daily vlogs for another month.

        I do have to admit that there are some day's where I don't want to bother vlogging or I'm not in the mood but I made a goal of vlogging every day for the next year, I can't quit 36 days in! I have been wanting to do daily vlogs every day for a year for a few years and I just haven't done it yet. My main concern with it is when my camera decides to die. I'm going to have to get an inexpensive backup camera I think. Either that, or when I get the money, I'll just buy the same camera off of ebay.

        Doing daily vlogs has motivated me to really stick to what I say in terms of my goals. I really want to try and achieve loosing weight and a few other things. I have also started a collab channel with some of my friends, which I am really excited about. It is called The Bucket list 4. We just launched it this week and I'm stoked. The bucket list is also going to be an awesome motivation thing for me as well.

Imagine other's complexly

Watching youtubers online and meeting some of your closets friends via the internet can be an amazing thing but imagining them more than a 2nd moving picture, or words on a screen can prove to be difficult. As John Green said in his book Paper towns, “Imagine others complexly.” Which was difficult for me to do, until I got to meet several of my friends at Vidcon this year. As well as I felt I knew some of them, it was hard to imagine them complexly, until I could physically touch them, hug them, talk to them face to face and interact with them more deeply.


As huge and as vast as the online world is and as much drama as it can cause, it can bring a community of people together, introduce people from entirely different countries but for me, I have found it more profound to meet these people face to face and it has helped me Imagine other's complexly.


Who is there to thank? There are so many people that led me and my youtube family together, that I can't thank just one person. 

Vidcon 2012

photo edit by screennamemissing

I just got back from Tampa airport from Vidcon 2012 and I have to say that it was an absolutely incredible experience. I know I won't be able to express in words how much it meant to me to meet some of my #teamregulars and hanging out with Tony and Sebby, as well as meeting so many amazing youtubers. I cannot describe the love, friendship and community I experienced the last few days, even more so than last year.

When I left tampa airport, I was incredibly anxious about getting there and it didn't help that I spent a majority of the day in Chicago because my connecting flight was canceled and I was given another flight for the following day, which wasn't going to work. I managed to get another flight for that day and get to John Wayne airport. Granted it was considerably later than I had originally planned, but I got there.

Vanessa, Lauren and Rachel came and picked me up from the airport, which was amazing. Then when I checked in and went to see everyone in the other room we had, they all surprised me with birthday cupcakes. <3 It honestly made my day so much better, and I have to thank them all for that. It was such a simple thing but gave me so much joy!

After I had dropped my stuff off in my room, we all headed over to the vidcon pre-party and hung out for a while. Later in the evening, Tony and Seb showed up. Tony was so funny, he was epic fan girling that we were all together in person for the first time. It was so amazing. I wish I had gotten it on camera. Once we were all kinda done at the previdcon party, we all went to denny's and this happened. Watch the video!

Disney Land was allot of fun as well. I initially wasn't too thrilled about going and thought about not going because my thought process was "I've been to Disney World, how different can it be?" I have to admit, it was far different. Sure it was just as exhausting as any other park but it was so much fun! That's to Tito, who gave us some passes and just being a great friend.

For me, I think the most significant part of the trip was the night we did the live stream on youtube. I think they were calling it "talking to the dead." Tony had brought in a medium.  Granted, I think this medium was simply just empathic and was just pretty good at reading people's body language. I don't think she was necessarily a full blown medium. Anyway, that night had really got me thinking and I looked back on some stuff that I had written and thinking about my future but that's another blog post altogether. Several inside jokes came out of that night as well. ^_^ The medium gave me her e-mail address, so hopefully she'll get back to me soon because I would like to talk to her more.

I am so glad that my team regulars, tony and seb along with some of the Black Box TV behind the scene's peeps were able to get together VidCon and get to know eachother better and hang out! The experience was above and beyond what I expected it to be. I think our friendship went to a whole other level, now that we know we're all actually real! I still can't really describe the experience at all and it's something that I'm going to remember for the rest of my life. It's also helped me with some huge life decisions I am going to be making here soon as well.

I will be posting pictures and videos up on my facebook and on youtube here in a few days. Just follow me on twitter and on my vlog channel and "main" channel as well as my facebook. :-) Next year, I'm going to try and post daily blogs for sure. Hopefully I'll have a laptop by then!

what a whirlwind

http://www.etsy.com/shop/LumosHallows

Things have been crazy the last couple of weeks. Especially financially. My mom and I are having to find another place to live because apparently where we are living now, does not allow pets. So we are scrambling to get another place to move too and somehow trying to find a way to get some extra money to pay for that. We have been staying in a family member's condo, rent free for around 3 or 4 months now. Haven't had to pay the water or light bill, which has been a true blessing but as life happens, the blessing is passing. Albeit, it would be allot easier if I was able to find a job and the situation wouldn't be so difficult.

Another thing that I am stoked for (but at the same time I wish wasn't for another month), is Vidcon. For those that don't know what vidcon is, Vidcon is a youtube oriented conference out in Aneheim, California. I went last year and I had loads of fun and met so many amazing people as well as getting to meet a few of my online friends face to face for the first time. It's going to be difficult though because the money I had saved up for the trip, I have had to put it towards another apartment and I am coming up short money wise. I am sharing a room with 3 other people, but not sure how I'm going to cover my part and my food expenses as well as getting to and from the airport. So, that is another thing I am stressed about. I don't exactly want to forget about going to vidcon, since I already bought my pass and I bought my plane ticket. I don't want to throw that money away. I just need to find out how to get the rest of the money.

I am trying to find some odd jobs this week and hopefully sell a few diaper cakes before Wednesday, June 27th. So, if you are reading this and you are going to a baby shower, please check out my etsy page and buy an epic gift for the mom to be! *hint hint* Or at least share my etsy store with your friends and family. I would greatly appreciate it! I am not the type to ask for handouts. I would rather earn the money that I need. I do custom diaper cakes as well. So don't fret if I don't have something you like.

I am praying that everything works out and try to celebrate my birthday this coming Saturday as best as I can. I just can't believe I'm turning 23 this Saturday! It's just crazy.